Expectations:
I expected to meet all the doctors.
I expected to get a plan.
I expected to feel overwhelmed.
Reality:
I met a genetic counselor and one doctor (who were both super informative and exceptionally nice) but I will not be seeing either very much.
I was given guidance, but not a definite plan.
I do not feel overwhelmed, even though none of the responsibility was taken off my shoulders.
We discussed my family. I was a little sad talking about Grandma, and a little when we told them about my dad's cancer and his upcoming radiation. We moved into where I am in life and the research I had done prior to our meeting. The basics- 25, married, in law school, type A personality. No one was surprised by that last one!
Then, we got to the big stuff. There are preventative measures. For the breast cancer bit, my best option would be to have both of my breasts removed. For me, this just is not an option right now. My husband and I are planning on having children and I would like to at least try to breast feed. Another option would be tamoxifen (which is referred in terms of chemo and made us flinch a little) and some studies show that the oral medication can reduce my chances by 50%. Again, this one will not work right now because we want kids. So, what do I do?! What do I do to reduce my risk of breast cancer?
For the ovarian cancer bit, my best option would be to have my ovaries and uterus removed. Not going to work... How do you make a baby without those? We learned a big thing here- tamoxifen will not help reduce my risk for ovarian cancer. My mom and I were both surprised by that news, because the research we had gone through had not discussed this snag. Ovarian cancer is the scarier of the two risks because there are fewer options to reduce my risk. So, what do I do?!
Here's the things I'm going to do no matter what:
1. Get two clinical breast exams every year. This is more than your normal OBGYN breast exam.
2. Get one MRI every year. It is not a full body scan, but I do not have the full information on it yet.
3. When I turn 30, I will start getting a mammogram every year.
4. When I turn 30, I may start getting ultrasounds.
So, the doctors do not want to expose me to too much radiation too soon, that's why the last two are after 30. So there are drawbacks to all the tests, but they have their obvious benefits. The breast exams are good, especially if the same person does them because they know what to expect from your breasts specifically. Same with the MRI and mammogram and ultrasounds, but with the machine. So doctors want a patient to use the same machine for every MRI, mammogram, and ultrasound because it is less likely to have false positives related to the machine. MRI's have less radiation, while mammograms have a little more, but they said no more than standing too close to the microwave. (I now stand like four more steps back from the microwave!)
So, in my research I kept reading that if you have dense breasts, mammograms are less effective. So I ask the counselor- How do I know if I have dense breasts? Both her and the doctor look at me, smile, and say- "You're young. You have dense breasts." Well that makes a lot of sense, but no where did I read it in my research. So then my mom asks a valid question- What do we do if we see something on the scan? It had not even crossed my mind! (I might be optimistic to a fault)
We go down that rabbit hole. If they see something on the MRI, we might then schedule a mammogram (even before 30 if that's the case), because the mammogram may be able to distinguish between a tumor and a calcification. We talked about biopsies and kind of stopped there. Obviously I need to know what to do if we find something, but right now I am not ready. Hopefully I won't have to be ready for awhile, if at all.
The elephant in the room- kids. When should I have them? How many should I have? How much does each child help prevent cancer? Give me a plan ladies! No such luck... This is the part that was hard for me because I wanted definite answers and I got guidance. I understand why I only got guidance, but that does not mean I wasn't upset.
The questions I asked:
1. A study said if I have five kids it will cut my risk in half for both breast and ovarian cancer, true?
Answer- Not necessarily. There is no way of knowing this is true. Other factors were involved.
2. A study said if I get pregnant it will push cancer back for a year, true?
Answer- Not necessarily. Pregnancy helps, and breast feeding for a year helps, but no definites.
3. A study said the earlier I have children the more I decrease my risks, true?
Answer- True- but! from one year to the next it is not a big enough difference to rush anything.
4. A study said I shouldn't have children after 35 because it increases my risks, true?
Answer- Kind of true. 35 is an age when a woman's body can start changing, so maybe?
5. Should I have a kid tomorrow? Can I wait two years? (Yes I asked this. Everyone blushed.)
Answer- That is up to your family. Having a baby at 26 is better than 28, but not by much.
Being 25, I will be the first to admit, my biological clock is ticking. It started ticking louder when I got married. Louder still when I turned 25. And the loudest when I got my positive test in December. But... I'm in law school. I finished my first semester and am slowly but surely getting through the second semester. So, my husband and I have to assess our life and figure out what we want to do. (Monday was have a kid, Tuesday was no way!, Wednesday was I don't get enough sleep as it is right now!, Thursday was other people have done it, we can do it!, Friday was what's best for me and my body?, Saturday was should my health be the only factor?, Today is a I don't want that crying kid I saw at the mall, but I would take the adorable princess that smiled at me at Dick's.)
It was a lot on Thursday. So, what did I do all weekend? Anything but think about the appointment. Friday was my brother's hockey game, my brother-in-law's basketball game, and bowling with two BILs, one of their girlfriends, and my husband. Saturday was helping a friend move, church, my BIL's basketball game, dinner at the in-laws, and a Mario Cart night. Today was clean the house, do the laundry, and go shopping. I found two beautiful dresses, a fabulous pair of shades, earrings to go with one of the dresses, and an anchor necklace. I'm partial to anchors.
After such a fun packed weekend, I feel charged for a good week. So, I have a lot going through my mind, but I'm still sunny and optimistic. Thanks for reading, this one was hard :)
Life's roughest storms prove the strength of our anchors.
